Today was dull & slow compared to yesterday. I feel like we accomplished more yesterday.
I want to do more. I want to see more.
I don't want to come off as overzealous. Maybe I care too much?
I feel a bit washed out near the evenings. But still wanna do more, accomplish more. 'Cause I feel like an insect, a ghost when consultations/discussions/procedures happen.
Insignificant. Stupid.
Plus, he wasn't very cheerful today. I was counting on his cheerfulness for an 'energy' boost. An inspiration, to end a lagging day. Ah, well. He did have a nice red shirt on. Suits him. :)
Shouldn't let such things affect me so. I gotta be more 'independent'. I gotta read up. I gotta liveeatbreathe at the hospital.
It sounds so... lonely.
Maybe I'm yearning for my ashke. Or an ashke.
Maybe I'm burning out. And it's not even Friday yet, goddammit.
The Hanged Man. That's what I feel like now.
Suspended. Stilled.
I hope I can break out of this mood. I will. I have to.
But for now... I shall go, sit, ponder and listen to One Republic's Goodbye Apathy.
Just for awhile, ...just for awhile.
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